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Archive for December 17th, 2008

lunch break

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From The Onion

$700 Billion Bailout Celebrated With Lavish $800 Billion Executive Party

Amid the bleak backdrop of imminent economic collapse, worried observers got some good news last October when executives from the nation’s top 10 failing companies celebrated the historic $700 billion government bailout with an ultra- extravagant $800 billion party aimed at restoring confidence and bolstering their resolve.

“I’m glad we were all humble enough to recognize that we couldn’t do this on our own,” said AIG CEO Edward Liddy, sitting in a hot tub filled with Cristal and seven dozen endangered-quail eggs. “Having come so close to disaster, it is crucial that I eat these 24-karat-gold-leaf-wrapped chocolate truffles to boost stockholder morale and show all the critics and naysayers that we are carrying on just as we always have.”

We’re In An Economy-Sized Pickle!

Sorry to be a Cindy Cynic, but I think those of us who buy lots of stuff, including many things we don’t need, are the unsung heroes that kept the wheels of prosperity rolling for so long, and we deserve to be treated accordingly!

The Onion…the truths we never want to hear…

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